“The air was full of Thoughts and Things to Say,” writes Arundhati Roy in The God of Small Things.
“But at times like these, only the Small Things are ever said. Big Things lurk unsaid inside.”
In a world full of words, I’ve been thinking of the ones that lurk inside recently. The feelings I only partly express, the regrets I don’t touch on. The gratitude left unsaid. The grievances I hold back, the pain I don’t share. The pain of others, felt but not mentioned.
When I’m with family, or friends, and only the Small Things are ever said, I find it frustrating. I’d like it all out in the open. All the debts, out on the dinner table. All the feelings, all the sorrows, all the hopes, discussed and dissected.
But I’m slowly learning that not everything needs that treatment. I can feel love, and a bond, without always naming it. I can empathize without constantly talking it through. I can sit with grief and wait it out. Not every moment needs a heavy chat. I don’t always have to blurt it out. Maybe, sometimes, it’s ok to just be together.
Big Things get said in their own time.
![letter wood stamp lot letter wood stamp lot](https://images.unsplash.com/reserve/uZYSV4nuQeyq64azfVIn_15130980706_64134efc6e_o.jpg?crop=entropy&cs=tinysrgb&fit=max&fm=jpg&ixid=M3wzMDAzMzh8MHwxfHNlYXJjaHwxNnx8d29yZHN8ZW58MHx8fHwxNzIwNzg2NjkzfDA&ixlib=rb-4.0.3&q=80&w=1080)
I loved this one! I’m 100% that person as well, want it all out, all the time.
Wise words Agathe. I am learning this very slowly !